Pregnancy and Postpartum

This photo of a new mom holding her 3 day old baby has gone viral this week and Yahoo Parenting interviewed me to ask me why I thought women had been moved by this post in which Danielle Haines portrays the difficulties and raw emotions she experienced in the first few days of motherhood.

I had a great conversation about Haines’ original post and image with Rachel Bertsche, a writer for Yahoo Parenting. Here is an excerpt from our conversation:

“Dr. Sarah Allen, a psychologist who specializes in pregnancy and postpartum mental health, says Haines has done a service to all new mothers by sharing her photo. “We tend to picture a new mom cradling her baby, and she’s looking down and smiling and the baby is looking up at her lovingly, and the husband has his arm around the mom. Those are the images mothers are usually putting out there,” Allen tells Yahoo Parenting. “This is a mother saying, ‘This is the reality.’ I think it was so brave of her to share, and I applaud her. These things need to be shared. You don’t just have a baby and it suckles right away and it’s all happiness. It’s hard! If women realize that going in, they won’t be so hard on themselves when they have tough times.”

Allen says that while 20 percent of mothers suffer from postpartum depression, 80 to 85 percent get postpartum blues, which occurs during the first two weeks of a baby’s life and is likely what Haines was dealing with when the photo was taken. “The transition in the first couple of weeks postpartum, it’s difficult. Women have a lot of thoughts and myths and fantasies about what those days should be like, and it can be very isolating when what you do feel is overwhelmed and loneliness,” she says. “Plus, there are the physical effects — having a baby, it’s a lot for your body to go through, and your hormones are all over the place.” And even though those baby blues are incredibly common, most women don’t talk about it, which Allen says makes the experience even harder”.

Please read the complete Yahoo article here Mom’s Striking Photo 3 Days After Giving Birth Sparks Honest Confessions

Just in case you didn’t read the original post, along with this photo Danielle Haines posted the comment below. It touched a nerve with the community as the post received over 20,000 Facebook shares and Likes.

This is a picture of me 3 days postpartum. I was so raw and so open, I was a fucking mess. I loved my baby, I missed his daddy (he went back to work that day), I was mad at my mom, my heart hurt for my brother because my mom left us and now I had a little boy that looked like him, my nipples were cracked and bleeding, my milk was almost in, my baby was getting really hungry, I was feeling sad that people kill babies, like on purpose, I had not slept since I went into labor, I didn’t know how to put my boobs away, my vagina was sore from sitting on it while nursing constantly, I was kinda loosing my mind. Katie came over and feed me the morning this picture was taken. She might have even stopped over to feed me lunch. Then one of my 7 sisters came that evening to bring the family dinner, Sarah. Sarah took this picture of me. She walked in with food and said, “Hi! How are you!?” I said, “I’m a mess.” We talked, she listened, she said, “I’ve been right where you are.” It helped to know she went crazy once too!!! Then she said, “I know this might sound crazy but do you have a camera? You look so raw and so beautiful.” I’m so glad she took this picture. She was just planning to drop off food. She ended up staying for much longer. I needed her. She knew it. I called Rachel, I needed her. I needed her to nurse my baby, I needed more help with his latch. I called Shell. I needed her to tell me my baby was ok. This is real PP mamas. Those of you who have done it before….will you share what your immediate PP felt like?

If you have any questions after reading this article or want to know more about treatment for pregnancy and postpartum mood disorders

please contact me at 847 791-7722

or click below

Contact Sarah

 

 This article by Jackie Pilossoph was first published in the Northbrook Star

The whole point of life is that it’s supposed to be enjoyed, so why do we settle for getting by and getting through it? We need to have fun and enjoy it!

That’s something Northbrook psychologist, Dr. Sarah Allen, tells her patients, who she said are typically women in their 30’s, 40’s and 50’s suffering from issues that stem from anxiety.

“People are so consumed by the stress of work and children that they forget what they’re here for,” said Allen, who is a psychologist and a Licensed Clinical Professional Counselor. “Life can throw challenges, but if you are resilient, you can take those challenges head on, and the key to having resilience is looking after yourself and your own needs.”

Dr. Allen grew up in Portsmouth, England, and said she knew she wanted to become a psychologist at a very young age. She attended both undergraduate and graduate school in London, and as part of the curriculum, she worked in the maternity ward of a London hospital, an experience she said made her feel connected to women.

“I saw a need that wasn’t being addressed,” said Allen, who ended up being one of the first psychology students to do research on Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) following childbirth.

When she finished her dissertation, she began working with children and families, and moms who were suffering from depression.

“Women have a lot of pressure that we put on ourselves, and that society also puts on us,” she Allen, who is a mother of three and who has lived in Northbrook with her husband,  and their children for 17 years. “We’re always running. We’re working and running the house and trying to spend time with our children. It’s a lot.”

Allen, who has been in private practice in Northbrook for 16 years offers individual, couples and family therapy. In her living room style office with French country decor; which includes yellow painted walls, comfortable furniture, and a huge picture window with a view of large Oak trees, Allen said her goal is for her patients to relax, and feel like they can say anything to her.

“People often say, ‘This is going to shock you’, and I tell them that in 20 years of being a therapist, nothing shocks me”, she said. Allen treats anxiety, worrying and depression caused by issues such as relationships, work stress emotional eating, parenting stress, postpartum depression, and juggling work life balance.

“Stress is very sneaky and you don’t realize how much it can affect you” said Allen, who also puts on several workshops throughout the year at various Northbrook venues, including the Northbrook Public Library. “It affects mood, concentration, sex drive, immune system, and the digestive system, and has significant effects on other physical health problems.”

Allen said in treating her patients, she doesn’t spend time focusing on the past, but instead offers tools to help them cope with present day challenges.

“I help patients get back in control of their lives,” Allen said. “By taking control and thinking about things differently, and changing your thoughts and behavior, you can enjoy life more.”

A Northbrook mom who chose not to be identified for this article was a patient of Allen’s for a year and a half after struggling with anxiety for several years, which intensified after her pregnancies.

“What I love about Sarah is that she is very real and very into practical solutions”, she said. “She wasn’t there just to listen. She gave me actual strategies for dealing with anxiety”.

“I want people to be empowered,” Allen said. “Therapy is giving people tools to stop worrying, to sleep better, to eat better and to be healthier and happier.”

Dr. Allen has put together a booklet with some strategies that she is always giving to her clients to help them begin to feel less anxiety and to worry less.

Add your first name and email address in the box below and you will be sent the steps to download your FREE book.

Dr. Allen sees clients in her Northbrook office or for your convenience, via telephone or internet sessions

If you have any questions about how to reduce anxiety

please phone her at 847 791-7722 or

email me below